You guys, I’m in this place now where I’m just feeling a lot of things burning and changing. And I just wanted to share some of the resources and women that are carrying me right now.
In no particular order:
Danielle LaPorte – the fucking queen. Pioneer of getting clear on how you want to FEEL vs the things you want. This is my kind of manifesting. You say, I want to feel: beloved, capacious, seen – instead of saying I want an amazing boyfriend. And then you are open to WHATEVER happens – or IS happening – in your life that helps you feel that way – and maybe – probably – it’s not a new boyfriend. OG Lightworker.
Glennon Doyle – Author of Love Warrior, wife of Abby Wambach. Activist, ally, bulimia and alcohol sober. Worth an IG follow at the very least. Introduced me to the idea that love, might – just might – be the opposite of control, which for a control freak was/is a pretty radical notion and I, like Glennon, am still exploring it.
Sarah Jenks – This girl has been on my radar for a while and I have been in awe as I’ve watched her and her offerings change…and mature. I think becoming a mama had a lot to do with it, lol. A recent IG post of hers cemented her place on this list. New moms (also, I invite: old moms, single moms, married moms) – it’s not “take care of yourself” (impossible for a mom) it’s “make sure you’re being taken care of.” Lightbulb. And permission granted. AND…light shed on how fucked up our culture is towards women and moms. Yes, I’m slightly bitter. But because this is a post about truth telling, I don’t feel like sugarcoating it.
Elizabeth DiAlto – I take her with a grain of salt now – idk, maybe a little bit of a personality clash…? but I LOVE her dedication to being a truth teller and way back when, it was mostly through her that I discovered these ideas that now seem so fundamental – of self love, self acceptance, of this concept of woman as something radical and infinitely complex, something that had been diminished and twisted. Through her I discovered that femininity doesn’t have to mean lingerie, fuck me lips or fuck me anything – femininity could be strength and rage and all sorts of things. But as usual, we’ve been letting white men define things. And through her, I discovered:
Karen Hawkwood – this woman has been blowing my mind lately. I love how controversial she is. She’ll say shit like: astrology is bullshit. Most people are lying to themselves cause they’re weak and scared. True forgiveness is near impossible. The Suicide Prevention Hotline is useless. And lots of other stuff that is beautifully triggering. I freakin love it. It is all the shit that is true but we are scared to speak. If I felt like I wanted a mentor, I would chose you, Karen. I highly recommend Elizabeth DiAlto’s podcast with her – episode 260.
Rachel Cargle – before I was a mom, I thought being a feminist was obsolete. When I became a mom, I was plunged headfirst into the abyss of total inequality. I’m still in shock, I’m still outraged, I’m still not sure what the fuck to do or why more women aren’t as outraged as me. But one thing I’m sure about – I’m a total feminist and women are still certainly nowhere near equal to men, not in America, and definitely not in certain other countries. Once I became a feminist, I started to feel uncomfortably aware of other injustices and inequalities. But I felt like, they weren’t my fight because they weren’t personally affecting me. And then that began to feel as ridiculous as a “vegetarian” renouncing some types of meat but not others. Not in a lazy way but in a blinders-on dogmatic way.
Before Rachel Cargle, I would get defensive if I read an article by a LGBT+ person telling me how to be an ally. Or I would get defensive if someone kept pointing out my white privilege. After Rachel Cargle I’m aware of what “tone policing” (and a host of other terms I used to think were ridiculously micro-nuanced) is. Injustice is bigger than race or sex or gender. I’m working on increasing my capacity so I can carry this weighty truth. I’m learning a lot from Rachel about how to not fuck up as a white woman ally. That being a feminist means being anti-racist.
I feel like I’m forgetting some people – and I’m also intentionally leaving some people out – some people who have some good ideas but others that I strongly disagree with. Will update if anything major comes up.
What does this have to do with skin or acne you ask? Just that – if you’re in integrity with yourself, that gives you a glow not even the most skilled esthetician could draw out. Acne sucks – but you know what sucks even worse? A life not lived. A life full of regrets. A small life. A life of lies. Life is bigger than your face, babes – remember that.
Yep, no links – you’ll have to google.